Shortly after Peter woke up, he took my hand and guided me upstairs. He took me into Elyse's room, moved a few things out of his way, and climbed up on the edge of her crib to look in; just like he used to do after nap time to check if she was awake yet. He asked where she was and then proceeded to point our her blanket and pillow. Needless to say, I lost it.
Please understand that this was not a bad moment. It was a hard moment. I'm so grateful that Peter has special memories of his sister, and I'm grateful that he talks about her. It's just hard. And of course that set the mood for the day. Several more times I'd think through the last month and sadness would come upon me. I'd think about my precious little girl, and I'd just miss her. It was one of those days where a lump would rest at the bottom of my throat all day long.
I'm okay with these kinds of days, but they are a challenge.
Prayer requests for today:
- March 27 is only a week away. Please pray for us as her first birthday approaches. We will celebrate her life, but we will hurt.
- I'm starting a journal of all my memories of Elyse. Please pray that God will bring to my mind these precious memories, so that we can treasure them and pass them on to Peter and the other siblings to come.
- Please pray for our time in the Word. We treasure the time, but sometimes it's hard to know exactly where to go.
- We are not far away from getting the official cause of death from the coroner. Please pray for how we will disseminate this information.
- We praise God for how He has drawn April and me closer to each other.
- We praise God for the overall peace He's given us.
- We praise God for the friends He's placed beside us, especially during some of the darker moments.
- We praise God for how He continues to restore Peter.